Don't look this bitch in the eye.

Clash of the Titans

I totally understand why Hollywood felt the need to remake Clash of the Titans. It's an epic story which could benefit from updated special effects. But the remake is just...crap. Crap, crap, crap.

One problem I had is with Sam Worthington as Perseus. Yes he's foxy, comparable to a young Harry Hamlin. But the hair. Why would his hair be buzzed? All the other Greek characters have long, gorgeous, thick and braided hair. I get that they are trying to make Perseus stand out from all the other characters (he's the hero and a demi-god after all) but the hair is a huge problem. It doesn't make sense with the time period and Worthington is much more attractive with long hair. The proof is in Avatar.

Furthermore, Worthington's acting leaves lots to be desired. He's a very grunty hero, doesn't connect too much with the audience. At least Hamlin was slightly broody and put some emotion into the role. Worthington just pouts a bit, mostly grunts, and runs around. Even his growing love story with Io, the replacement for Bubo the owl, seemed forced and unnatural on his part. I know my opinion matters so much to Sam Worthington, but he really needs to prove himself to me. Action stars can make decent actors (hello Bruce Willis). I read reviews of Last Night, Worthington's upcoming relationship drama and critics weren't fawning over his performance.

The special effects were lackluster is my eyes. The scorpians are big and intimidating, but they look so fake. In the original, they looked much more real. Caron is all special effects; he looks like a cross between a tree and a skeleton. Big deal. Being a cloaked ferryman is far more intimidating, like in the original. We get few glimpses of him and all we see is creepy, lifelike bone. In Caron's case, less is more. And Medusa. She looks far more like a woman in the remake, which adds a humanistic touch but the audience doesn't need that with Medusa. She's a means to an end. Making her all reptile-esque like the original brought the scares better in my opinion. The one special effects improvement I saw was the Kraken. Much more intimidating with all the CGI. Those teeth, so sharp, so scary!

The story and writing was a bit of a disappointment in my eyes. Perseus and Pegasus meet for about five seconds and then the work together; no relationship development. Andromeda, totally useless. Yeah, she's a sacrifice and all, but no love story between her and Perseus. And I would've liked a little more focus on the other Gods.

I did enjoy seeing some fine actors making use of bad material. Liam Neeson and Ralph Fiennes had good chemistry and Zeus and Hades. And I did like the inclusion of Hades in this remake. Mads Mikkelson did fine as Draco, a mentor and fellow warrior to Perseus. Finally, it's nice to see Hans Matheson getting work in a big project, even if his character did get turned into stone by Medusa.

Maybe it's because I grew up loving the original and nothing will ever replace it in my heart. But this remake was a serious disappointment.


Michael C. Hall as Dexter

Dexter returns tonight! I'm so excited, I love this show. I don't love it just for the compelling story of a serial killer but for Michael C. Hall's performance in the titular role. He can play any emotion he's given and any situation he's in. He completely inhabits the role from the outside and in, as evident through Hall's excellent voice over work. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the day he wins his Emmy.

Netflix

Me and Orson Wells-I have faith that Zac Efron is more than a pretty face.
A Single Man-A must see for a second time.
The Thin Red Line-Netflix Instant. Can't go wrong with Terrence Malik.

Once you have signed up to terror, your mind closes right down. It becomes only our story that matters, not their story.

Five Minutes of Heaven

A powerful and thrilling meditation on revenge and redemption, Five Minutes of Heaven tells the story of Alistair Little, a former UVF member who killed Joe Griffen's brother. Twenty-five years later, the media arrange a reunion between the two changed men.

Five Minutes of Heaven looks at the difficulty of forgiveness and letting go, and how hate and regret can come together and be resolved. This is all portrayed in the fabulous performances by Liam Neeson as Little and James Nesbitt as Griffen. Neeson, brilliant as always, uses physicality and voice to portray his regret. His hands shake, his eyes droop down, his body and face scream sad. But he will not physically be at the mercy of Griffen. Despite his regret, Neeson carries Little as a strong man who has been through hell but wants to live. Similarly, Nesbitt gives a superb performance that relies heavily on physicality and voice. Lots of twitching, shouting, and nervous ticks color Joe Griffen through James Nesbitt. I haven't seen Nesbitt in much, but he did make an impression on me in his small but important role as a detective in Match Point.

This quiet, nearly scoreless movie creates ample tension through the performances and the direction. Tight shots follow Griffen as he descends towards Little. Griffen contemplates killing Little much in the way young Little contemplated going through with the murder twenty-five years ago. The two men mirror each other in an almost creepy way. The film is very intimate, like one is eavesdropping or watching from a distance all this go down. Five Minutes of Heaven's writing and shots reminded me of a Patrick Marber (Closer, Notes on a Scandal) script. As a viewer, one feels as if they are intruding and could interrupt a crucial moment at any second.

This film ponders whether enemies can become friends, media exploitation of grief and misery, is it possible to truly forgive and the power of redemption. Those are some pretty serious themes to deal with in a ninety-nine minute movie. Five Minutes of Heaven's length is its Achilles' heel. All the listed themes are vital to the film, so an extra thirty minutes might've been a good idea.

I highly recommend this film. Five Minutes of Heaven leaves a lasting impression.

Jane Lynch on Glee

This is one of the most obvious good performances I've written about. Lynch is fabulous as the hateful but sympathetic Sue Sylvester. Her humor is obvious and dry, simple and intelligent. Her height matches her big personality and she's one of the two, formerly three, reasons I continue to watch Glee. With all the TV I watch, I'd be easy for me to just forget a show that I wasn't enjoying as much anymore. But Lynch is hilarious and makes Glee more than bearable for me. I love her in all the Christopher Guest movies, The 40 Year Old Virgin, Arrested Development, etc. It's nice that I know her now as Jane Lynch and not "that funny, tall, blonde lady."

Netflix

My Wife is an Actress-I enjoy Charlotte Gainsbourg and I enjoy French cinema.
Temple Grandin-Well, it won all those Emmys.
This Is England-Netflix Instant. Keeps getting recommended to me.

You think I want to sell stolen wheelchairs for the rest of my life?

Date Night

Date Night is a comedy about a married couple looking to have a little fun but end up being chased around New York City by mobsters and crooked cops due to a mistaken identity. The film, with a fairly predictable plot and decent jokes, is given all its magic through the king and queen of TV comedy, Steve Carrell and Tina Fey.

Carrell and Fey have their prestigious titles for a reason. They each have their own brand of awkward but intelligent humor that can be watered down or magnified to reach audiences of most ages and IQ levels. In Date Night, their humor is slightly dumbed down but hilarious none the less. They have wonderful, natural chemistry and easily slip into the role of a married couple, The Fosters, stuck in routines. But when this boring, normal, and believable couple are thrown into an extreme situation, the comedy sparks start flying.

But along with this comedy comes a heartwarming feeling. The Fosters are clearly in love, they've just lost each other a little bit. And they do not want to become what their newly separated friends became, "Really awesome roommates." Watching the Fosters run around in their extreme situation brings the laughs but seeing them work so well together as a couple brings the "awws." This shows that Carrell and Fey aren't just funny, but good actors as well.

The supporting cast also brings the laughs. Mila Kunis and James Franco make a hilarious appearance as a trashy couple with the answer to the Foster's problems. Mark Wahlburg's hotness is almost too much to handle and William Fitchner, yet again, shows that he can do anything, even pervy comedy.

Lots of couples go through sparkless ruts like the Fosters. Hopefully lots are lucky enough to get it back and rediscover each other.

Paul Rudd in Dinner for Schmucks

While this was an ensemble film with laughs from all actors, Paul Rudd stood out. His character, Tim, was a bit of an asshole, something we aren't used to seeing from Rudd. His character in the original French version is waaayy more of a dick, but Tim is an ass. It's nice to see Paul Rudd try to be more than a nice or cluelessly funny guy, and be believable at it. Though he has his nice guy moments and turns out to be a nice guy in the end, props to Rudd for trying something different.

Netflix

A Prophet-A supposedly brilliant French film.
The Ghost Writer-Regardless of who Polanski is as a person, he's a genius behind the camera.
The Young Victoria-Netflix Instant. I didn't wanna see this in theaters but I'll check it out since it's on Instant.

You know it's not easy being your friend.

The Expendables

This testosterone filled action movie has bad acting, overly dramatic music, poor writing, minimal and cliched character development (if any) and action vets who need to renew their AARP membership. The Expendables is just...bad.

But who cares?

Yes, this "film" is a total mess. I was seriously worried about Sly Stallone's veins popping out of his skin, not to mention him blowing his knee out or maybe having a heart attack.

The story and script are your typical action movie stories and script...explosion explosion, fight scene fight scene, explosion explosion, dangerous dictators that need to be taken out, fight scene, a woman, explosion explosion, the end. But the fight scenes, although ridiculous, are pretty fantastic and exceptionally well choreographed. The explosions are never ending and always appreciated. The guns are loud and the knives are accurate. It's really just one thing after another and the scenes just get better and more ludicrous.

What's most important about The Expendables is its conceit--which is really kind of genius. Screenwriter Stallone is saying, "Let's get all these old and almost old action stars (and athletes) into one movie doing all the things they did when they were younger. Let's throw dictators plus a million and one explosions into the mix. Let's be totally ridiculous and off the wall and dumb for the sake of entertainment." In other words, The Expendables is totally campy and self aware; it knows what it is and embraces it whole heartedly. That awareness makes the movie intentionally and unintentionally hilarious simultaneously. The dramatic lines are just too dramatic to be serious and therefore I laugh. The action scenes are too over the top to be shocking and therefore I laugh. Some of the intentional jokes are really funny--and therefore I laugh.

The Expendables is crap...golden crap. I recommend it if you need an engrossing distraction and want to turn your brain off.

Sigourney Weaver in Working Girl

Sigourney Weaver is just so cool. She's likable and she totally kicks ass in the Alien films (so I've heard). But geez, she's such a bitch in Working Girl. Not only is she is a bitch but Weaver plays her as a completely single-minded woman. She's number one, she's the only person that matters and you're in trouble if you cross her. I wouldn't want to cross her. But Weaver is so masterful in this role because we usually love her characters, but Katherine has no redeeming qualities. And Weaver made sure of that.


Netflix

After.Life-Liam Neeson as a bad guy? Okay!
The Dinner Game-The original French film that Dinner for Schmucks is based on. I loved Dinner for Schmucks so I'm curious to see the original.
Doctor Who-Netflix Instant. They have all the seasons available and since I hear such great things I should check it out.

And I will lead them on a merry chase.

I have been so sucky with this blog this summer. Apologies.

Inception

But on a more serious note, if you haven't seen Inception, the greatest film of the summer, probably the year and one of the most important cinematic experiences of my life, then DO NOT read on. I refuse to spoil this movie for anyone who hasn't seen it. But seriously, if you haven't seen it, get your butt to a movie theater immediately. How could you have waited so long?

The film is an absolute masterpiece. An original storyline (though I think Chris Nolan might've been inspired by Roswell), a flawless cast, mind blowing special effects, powerful music, Inception has saved 2010 from being one of the weakest movie years.

First off, this GQ cast. Hottest cast since Star Trek, hands down. Everyone is beautiful in their unique ways, even Ellen Page. Looks aside, this cast is incredibly talented and all turn in exceptional performances. This is one of Leonardo DiCaprio's finest roles. His character, an extractor named Dom, comes with heavy emotional baggage and DiCaprio handles it perfectly. He's great at playing a broken man, his eyes say it all. Though Dom is the main character and DiCaprio gives an Oscar worthy performance, I don't know if he'll get his much deserved statue for this, because though Dom is the main character, Inception cannot function without all the other characters. This is truly masterful ensemble work.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt is charming (as usual) but is definitely not the same Joseph Gordon-Levitt we've seen before. He is charming but he has a suave and debonairness to him. Furthermore, he executes his action scenes perfectly, like he'd been doing him since birth. Inception could definitely catapult him to the A-List, though he's been on my A-List for years. Ellen Page ALMOST made me forget she was Juno, so that says a lot. I loved her character and Page held her own in her company.

Marion Cotillard is heartbreakingly beautiful and that look was necessary for her character, Mal. She was well cast in her role. She took on a huge weight with the role, because she was one of (if not the most) important characters. Cotillard's talents were put to good use, I could see her getting nominated for an Oscar for this. Anyone who thought her character was annoying just didn't get it.

I could go on and on about the other actors but then I'd be writing all day. To sum it up, Ken Watanabe was superb and Hollywood needs to put him in more films. Cillian Murphy gave an excellent spin on a fairly stereotypical role. Michael Caine was barely in Inception, but his few moments on screen were enjoyable as usual. Newcomer Tom Hardy has left a strong impact on audiences and Hollywood. I wouldn't be surprised if he exploded in the next couple years. He brought a necessary light and humor to a very heavy film.

On to the special effects. Mind bending, mind blowing, inspiring, unlike anything I've seen before. But these aren't your Michael Bay special effects. Not only are these awe inspiring but they add to the story. Inception and its concept cannot exist without these special effects. Bending cities, gravity-less fights, epic chase sequences in houses, the streets, and snow, I don't have the adequate words to write how great they are. Joseph Gordon-Levitt's gravity-less fight scene two levels down was just incredible. How they filmed it, I don't care to know, I'd rather just live in the dream. Definitely one of the best fight scenes I've ever seen.

Hans Zimmer composed an impeccable soundtrack, which I'm listening to as I write. Heartbreaking songs but also pieces that get your blood pumping, each song fits right in with its scene, especially "Time," the last song. Zimmer apparently designed the film's distinct noise, and most of the soundtrack, around "Non Je Ne Regrette Rein," the Edith Piaf song (the woman Marion Cotillard got her Oscar for playing) that's used as the musical cue. This soundtrack is essential to any serious movie goer's collection.

The costumes are note-perfect. Great tailoring, beautiful to look at, and each piece fitting their character's personality.

Finally, the story. The story and all its complexities. Seeing Inception twice already has definitely helped me understand everything better. There is just so much going on both in front of you and themes of guilt, metaphors, etc. All the dreams within a dream, the different levels and time, limbo, totems, each character's role, I can't imagine what studio execs and the actors thought the first time they read it. And the ending...my God the ending. I believe that Dom is still in limbo, he never made it out. But it doesn't matter. His character made an incredible transformation. At the beginning, he was obsessed with always knowing what was reality and what was a dream but after everything he's gone through in the film, he throws in the towel; what makes him happy is what's real. And whether that's being awake or being asleep, it doesn't matter. This is a character who was very broken, ready to shoot himself in the head if he wasn't in reality and he did a complete 180. I do not think the whole film was a dream, with the dream being Dom's way of dealing with his guilt over Mal. While I would not be disappointed and I don't see it as a cop out, I just simply don't believe it. However, if it were all a dream, that would not make the film any less powerful or Dom's catharsis any less meaningful.

Some have written that Inception is a metaphor for filmmaking, with each character representing an integral part of film. Saito is the money guy, Dom the director, Ariadne (Page) the screenwriter, Fischer the audience, Arthur (Gordon-Levitt) the producer, and Eames (Hardy) the actor. They all work together to create this imaginary world for Fischer as the audience. Dom and the others take Fischer through an exciting and mind blowing journey that leaves him a changed man, much like a director and his team take an audience through a journey in a great film. Furthermore, the notion of playing with dreams makes the dreamer aware that he is in a dream is like how audiences lose focus on a film when there is an implausible or unnecessary scene, they come back to reality. Below are two articles that will help audiences with any confusions they have about Inception and further explain Inception as a metaphor for filmmaking.

Inception Explained
Filmmaking

Chris Nolan, you continue to outdo yourself and raise the bar for filmmaking. You are incapable of making a bad movie. Thanks for giving sharing your gift with us and please keep sharing.

I'm glad I saw Inception twice and I hope to see it again. I will be good every time but nothing will ever be as good as the very first time, when I had no idea what to except and I saw everything unfold in front of me for the first time. Inception will withstand the test of time and is an instant classic.

George Clooney in Michael Clayton

I'm all about scenery chewing, give me Al Pacino in nearly anything and I'll be satisfied. But I love, love, love a strong and believable performances that's mostly subtly. My mind constantly goes back to George Clooney as the title role in Michael Clayton when I think of strong subtly. His last scene alone, as the credits role, is enough for me to write about him. After everything that's happened, he sits in cab and tells the cabbie to just drive. If I hadn't seen one minute of the film and I just saw this last part, I'd know that this character just went through hell. Clooney writes it all over his face; his eyes, cheeks, mouth, his gaze, the placement of his hand. But there are no tears, no words, no noises; it's all coming from within Clooney.

Netflix

Five Minutes of Heaven-Irish film with Liam Neeson. Looks promising.
Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief-Missed this. I love Greek gods.
Pushing Daisies-Netflix Instant. Lee Pace is a fox and I always wanted to watch this short lived comedy.

We're doomed.

Star Wars: Episode IV-A New Hope

I was enjoying Star Wars at cardio cinema this week and while I was running on the treadmill, I realized how long it had been since I'd even seen Star Wars. And it's good! So, so good! Star Wars was revolutionary for its time and will be revolutionary forever. Special effects and storytelling techniques made it a trailblazer and contributed to its icon status, along with casting and music.

Star Wars was soooooo well cast, especially with Harrison Ford as bad ass, charming space cowboy, Han Solo. He's charismatic and delivers those one liners like no other. Harrison Ford is an icon, a star. Carrie Fisher is simultaneously bold and sophisticated, she's not your typical princess. Mark Hamil, very very good as a whiny dreamer whose destiny finds him sooner than he thought. He's great at developing his character as the film progresses. Very natural and believable. And James Earl Jones...that voice. The voice says it all.

Viewers now are totally spoiled by special effects. If the latest action or sci fi/fantasy film's effects are not as good as the film that came out last week, we rip the effects apart. For its time, Star Wars' special effects were amazing. Everything looked pretty real, and it definitely amazed me as a kid. But Star Wars is timeless, and the special effects are a part of that timelessness. They are still quite mesmerizing. If I saw them in a film now, I wouldn't complain.

The story is great and the techniques used to tell the story are revolutionary. All the back story is seamlessly woven in. We meet these characters who have history and all this craziness has already taken place. Telling the story out of order was relatively new and just created intense intrigue without distracting from the film on the screen. It's too bad Lucas' writing talent didn't carry over to episode 1-3.

I don't know if I could call myself a fan girl, but I definitely geek out over some sci-fi and Star Wars is one of them. Great storytelling, acting, filming, etc. One of the best films ever made.

Mark Wahlberg in The Departed

First person to appear twice! Seriously, never has a character whose every other word is a curse word sounded so poetic. And he saves the day. Enough said. Put Mark Wahlberg in everything.


Netflix

The Happening-Yes, this movie is 100% absolute crap. But with the plot that it has...it's like a car wreck. I just can't not look.
The Golden Child-Recommended by someone with similar taste to mine, even though I dislike Eddie Murphy.
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo-Netflix Instant. Must read the book. Must see the movie.

This life came so close to never happening.

25th Hour

Spike Lee has made some pretty powerful films and 25th Hour packs one of the biggest, most powerful emotional punches in my opinion. This film about drug dealer Monty's (Edward Norton) last day of freedom before a seven year prison stint is a masterpiece of human emotion and a gorgeous love letter to New York City.

The performances in 25th Hour are superb, beginning with Edward Norton. He brings a confidence but overpowering vulnerability to the role. He's a good, smart guy who does bad things; you don't want to feel sorry for him, especially in the scene where you see him brush off a man he sold to, but Norton makes you feel sympathy. His "Fuck You" scene is so earth shattering and it takes a truly gifted actor to deliver it. He blames every person he can think of for what happened to him, until he realizes he only has himself to blame. Along with Norton's stellar performance is Phillip Seymour Hoffman as Monty's friend Jacob. His awkwardness is spot on.

Barry Pepper adds to the film's amazing cast. He too brings confidence and vulnerability to his role as a friend of Monty's. His honesty is brutal. His final scene in the film is utterly devastating but he and Norton play together brilliantly. Finally, as Monty's father, the always amazing Brian Cox continues to be always amazing. The female representatives, Anna Paquin and Rosario Dawson, round out this perfectly cast film.

Spike Lee and writer David Benioff worked together so well. Neither could function without the other. Benioff wrote a beautiful story and Lee brought it to life. Furthermore, the use of a post 9/11 New York further adds to the story's theme of making use of what little time we have. Lee did not merely make mention of post 9/11 New York, he thrust us right into the middle of it, with Pepper's character's apartment overlooking Ground Zero. I like the Lee did not shy away from these powerful and potentially controversial imagery. This is a part of New York now, and New York is a character in this film.

Another brilliant aspect of 25th Hour is the relationship between Monty and his dog, Doyle. They are so similar; kind but with bite and steadfastly loyal and protective. The film's opening scene between the two gives great insight into Monty as a person. Doyle is a symbol of Monty, and the way Monty looks and is at the end of the film is exactly how Doyle began. Hopefully Monty will have the same future Doyle was given.

25th Hour has such a strong emotional core and such unbelievable heart. The performances, the script, the direction, everything comes together so beautifully it moves me to tears. 25th Hour is about as perfect as a film can get.

Jamie Lee Curtis in Freaky Friday

We sometimes think of our parents as so uncool and out of touch that they couldn't possibly be us. Well, Jamie Lee Curtis playing a mom who changes bodies with her teenage daughter is certainly an exception. She's totally believable as a teenager trapped in the body of an adult. Everything is very natural. Her mannerisms and behavior is true to teenage form and hilarious, especially when she's a tad over dramatic. I would love to know how she prepared for this role. She was great.

Netflix

Alice in Wonderland-Missed it.
Up in the Air-Love it.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer (every season)-Netflix Instant. Time I watched all the seasons and finally see how it ends.